Years ago, I took several courses through a well known self development company. I was very impressed with the facilitators of the seminars – especially how they handled people who became upset or angry during a process.
They never got triggered or upset themselves. Even when people personally attacked them, they remained calm, present, almost detached. I became so enthralled with one leader in particular, I asked her about this trait they all seemed to possess.
She said to me “Do you know what the difference is between you and these seminar leaders?” I waited for the profound piece of wisdom she was about to impart.
“They get over it faster.”
Get over what? Anything. Upset, anger, fear, guilt, embarrassment. It’s not that they don’t feel any of these things. They are human after all. It’s just that they get over it – fast.
I’ve learned that the path to enlightenment doesn’t necessarily require sitting cross-legged on a mountain top or months spent in an ashram in India. It actually requires living in and among others and learning from every interaction we have.
As many of us know, awareness is the first step to change. So to with enlightenment.
Most of us also know that we first become aware of our “stuff” after the fact. We have an argument and in the heat of battle, we lose our perspective. It’s not until later when we’ve cooled off that we start to see things a little clearer.
Hindsight really is 20/20.
Insight happens in the moment. Just as you’re about to get triggered, you recognize that the conversation you’re having is in a downward spiral, so you choose to change it. You either walk away, take a deep breath, or decide not to react.
Foresight is the ability to see the words, triggers, and hot buttons ahead of time and avoid them. It’s understanding that our emotions come from our thoughts and being able to observe our thoughts from an objective perspective.
Enlightenment (or a large part of it) is possessing insight and foresight. Staying present, an observer of what’s happening, in control of your thoughts.
If you’re just starting to play with this idea of enlightenment – you will most likely begin with developing hindsight – and that’s exactly where you should start.
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